Calculation to Disaster
by SparkyStarZ-13
Summary: When Kenny convinces Dawn to go an a cruse to Kanto with him, he hatches up a plan to rig the on-board, online, match-making system. But will this game of hearts really go down well with Dawn? *Pearlshipping
1. Chapter 1

**Calculation to Disaster**

**Chapter 1**

**SsZ-13**

**AN: This is an idea from the Disney series _Suite Life on Deck. _This is one of my favourite comedies! And if gave me a...decent idea (at 2:46 in the morning...) that I'd like to play with :)**

**I hope you guys like it! And Thanks for reading ;)**

**Roll `em!**

**--**

"What in the world compelled me to do this?"

"Maybe the fact that you're sick of being alone and unwanted..."

"Well one, why did I _ever _go on this cruse with you? And two, it has nothing to do with me having a boyfriend, it's having to do with you begging me to do this stupid thing!"

"One, because we both wanted to head to Kanto. And two, because it's not boring... It's fun!"

"I don't believe in all this internet match-making stuff anyway... How can a computer decided who you should fall in love with?"

"Because computers were invented by smart people... now just hurry up and finish! I'm getting hungry."

"Ughh... Fine." Dawn said in frustration, noticing how Kenny eyed the details on her screen.

After Dawn confessed she wanted to go to Kanto for school break this year, Kenny almost flew out of his chair, telling Dawn they should go together! Dawn, for some reason, decided it was a great idea; after all, Kenny was one of her best friends. Though, she really wished May was coming, but apparently, she was busy. _Busy_ meaning she had already planned something _special _with Drew...

So now, both her and Kenny were taking a _Love Calculation_ test that the ship was holding. Apparently, in the next two days, after everyone had submitted their details, everyone would be paired up with _their perfect match _ and _ live happily ever after. _Although Dawn thought it was all a bit of mumbo-jumbo, Kenny had convinced, if not, _forced_ her to take the test.

So, why not have a little fun with this stupid game of hearts? She wasn't very interested in meeting a sex-driven, teenage boy just yet, so why not play with her answers?

The first four questions consisted of the following:

_What is your name?_

_How old are you?_

_Male / Female?_

_What relationship are you looking for?_

Of course she decided on truthfully answering those, thinking it would be the best way to avoid an awkward situation. But when it came to questions like:

_What do you do in your spare time?_

_What's your favourite food?_

_What is your favourite flower?_

And things like that, she answered a little... un-honest. Maybe not call it a lie, but... a fib instead.

"Hey, you almost done?" Kenny blabbered. Making Dawn sigh at how impatient he was being.

"Yeah yeah... Almost." She looked over to Kenny's computer. "What are you up to- Hey! It's not even on! And you're telling me to hurry up!"

"Uh... I uh... finished ages ago."

"We've only been here 10 minutes." She sweatdropped.

"So? How hard is it to fill out things about yourself? It's not a maths quiz Dawn, gezz..."

"Whatever," she sighed. Getting up from her seat, she turned to Kenny and spoke. "I'm gonna get some hot chips while it loads, you want anything?"

"Nah, I'm fine. I'll stay here encase anyone steals out computers."

"Ok," she chirped, happy to be away from that glowing screen of stupidity. Sure, she liked going on the computer, but this was suppose to be a relaxing cruse, and what was she doing? Filling out a profile with her favourite flower in it.

"Ok..." Kenny said eagerly, leaning over to Dawn's screen. "Here we go...send!" He panicked, noticing Dawn coming back. He defiantly didn't want her catching him as he sent her new profile to himself...

"Kenny, what are you doing?"

"Nothing..." Said Kenny, lying on the floor. "Slipped...?"

**~-~**

"Yes!" He hissed, noticing the new e-mail in his inbox; titled: _Dawn Berlitz – Love Calculation Profile._

His plan was ingenious, unstoppable, fool-proof, flawless! ...in his own mind anyway.

Truth was, he never filled out his profile, he was waiting for Dawn to finish hers so he could take this new _Match-making _craziness into his own hands...

"Ok..." He licked his lips in excitement. "What do you do for fun?" He read out loud.

_I love soccer. I used to play it all the time in my backyard. I think I had real talent too! I even tried out for the school soccer club last year, but then I broke my ankle and couldn't quite make it to the dead-line. Though, since it is school break, I'm looking forward to getting 'on the ball' again. Haha._

Ok... This was all new to Kenny. How could he not notice this?! It was true that she broke her ankle last year, just before the teams were picked, but the fact that she had even tried out? Nope. That was all new...

But of course, being Kenny, he believed it; and wrote down in the little box on the screen how much he adored soccer. I mean, it seemed believable?

"Alright, next... What is your favourite food?"

Well this one was easy. She loved pasta- Wait. That's not what's written here...

_Oh definitely inago. I loved when mum made this! For those of you who don't know, it's cooked grasshopper. Most people find it disturbing, but me? I LOVE it..._

Kenny looked at the screen in shock. After all these years of knowing Dawn, and spying on her, he had NEVER seen her eat, or even touch a grasshopper. But...that's what the profile said, so, it must be true...

Wait – did he just say 'all these years of spying on her'?! How he hoped no one could read his thoughts...

Kenny continued to read the long and, not to mention, _**secret **_profile. Shock after shock! He had to check the e-mail 28 times to make sure the one he was reading was hers!

But, all of this was in the profile, written by her, so it _must _be true...

He copied all her answers, and put them in his own words. What if he had to _prove _to Dawn all of this?! Oh well... If it meant eating bugs, and wearing an Elvis Presley cape to bed, so be it.

**~-~**

The next two days came quickly for them both. Kenny was almost counting down to the second. Soon Dawn would see they were _perfect_ for each other...

IF his 'fool-proof' plan even worked...

"Here's your number... Enjoy!" Said the lady at the desk. She was wearing a short, pink, cocktail dress, with an oddly shaped beret; shaped more like a heart. In fact, everything here was shaped like a heart. Rather... overdone.

Dawn looked down at her number: 13

"Go figure..." She sighed. Who knows? Maybe it would be fun.

She looked around the room. She had to admit, there were some attractive, dare she say, cute guys here. But none she really noticed matched her number.

"Hey Dawn!" She heard Kenny's voice. Seriously, would he ever stop hassling her?

She turned around, forcing a smile on her face.

"Hey Kenn-" She stopped. Her eyes almost feel out of her head, and it seemed all the air had been sucked out of her. You could say... she was breathless! But that would be sugar coating the actual fact. '_Oh god no...'_

"K-Kenny' you're number..." She shuddered, mortified.

If she was fully concious, she would be able to noticed the expected grin that was spread across his face.

"Hey!" He said with enthusiasm. Once again, if Dawn wasn't in such shock, she would be able to notice that he wasn't as surprised as she was...

"Number 13! Same as me..."

–

**AN: I think now is a good place to stop.**

**This is only gonna go within 2-3 chapters. Nothing big.**

**I hope you all liked it! More to come! ;)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Calculation to Disaster**

**Chapter 2**

**SsZ-13**

**Roll `em!**

–

Dawn was mortified. But what could she do? Now this just proves those stupid match-making quizzes are a fail! There was just no way on earth that Dawn and...Kenny, had anything in common! It was just...impossible!

"So..." Kenny started. Now, back to earth, Dawn could notice the excitement in his voice. Now this was just plain uncomfortable...

Well, to get ANYONE at that manner was impossible... The answers she put in there, you'd have to be a complete lunatic to even get answers close to hers!

She gulped, failing to get rid of the lump of nerves in her throat. "So..." She managed.

"Well, this is awkward..." She muttered.

"Mmm... Unexpected..." Ok, now she KNEW something was up. The way he said that... sarcasm maybe?

"Well, uhh... Since when did you, um, play soccer?" She stuttered.

"Ever since I was little. I've always loved soccer!"

"I've never seen you play. Well, I have, but I don't think you want me to repeat that..."

"That was one P.E class, Dawn! Besides, I could say the same for you..." She looked at him, studying him. He must have right? There was no way he could have gotten her answers, so it must be true...

"Let's sit down..." Kenny said, already leading her to the candlelit table by the edge of the ship. Wait – candlelit?!

"Sure..." Dawn said, as though she couldn't breath. The table was covered in roses, and interesting shadows that danced across thanks to he candles.

Dawn started down; not really noticing what was going on around her. She was thinking of how she would get out of this one... Pretend to be sick perhaps?

"Want some?" Kenny asked, shoving a small container in her face. Her eyes widened. In front of her, sitting on lettuce leaves, was a serving of... dead crickets. She almost puked at the sight. Why was he- wait... She looked back at he answers in her profile. Why that little son of a-

"No thanks."

"But they're your favou- I mean... They're really good!" Kenny began to panic, he'd almost given his little trick away! Though, that was almost too obvious for Dawn.

"I um... never noticed you are that stuff..." Dawn hummed, waiting for an excuse.

"There's a lot you don't know about me Dawn..." Dawn fumed. After a 9 year friendship she should almost know everything about that lying little ass-wipe!

"Oh really?!" She yelled, standing up for her chair. "Like the fact that, you do aerobics?! Or how you want to be a astronaut when you grow up?! Or how you were an Elvis cape to bed, to help you sleep?!" She screamed. Retelling all the lies she had put in her profile.

Kenny went pale... She knew.

"Dawn, I-"

"How stupid do you think I am?! We've been friends for 9 years, longer! I thought you would know me better then that!"

"I-I don't think-"

"What were you doing with my profile anyway?! How did you get those answers?!"

"Dawn! Sit down, people are staring..."

"Let `em stair! I don't care! 'Cause I think they'd all agree with me! Hmph!" She huffed, storming off back to her cabin.

"Oh crap..." Kenny muttered to himself.

She didn't stop for anything, she stormed past everyone and everything in front of her. Until she lightly crashed into a ebony-haired boy.

"Sorry!" He blurted out. Dawn was about to screech at him, but when she saw his face, something inside her let this one slide...

It would have been a good idea if she had kept walking, just to keep up the scene, but she didn't. She quickly glided into a world of her own as she looked into the chestnut coloured eyes that stared down at her. She noticed a little fear in his eyes, and then remembered that she was suppose to be storming off upstairs...

"Uh... That's ok..." She whispered. She took a quick glance at the heart-shaped card pinned on his chest. "Ash Ketchum..." She quietly whispered to herself before leaving the scared boy, who was almost sure she was going to blow her top when he bumped into her.

But she didn't.

–

**AN: I kinda hoped it would turn out better then this... But this part of the story was probably the hardest...**

**Either way, I hope you liked it! And thanks for the reviews! :D**

**~Sparky**


	3. Chapter 3

**Calculation to Disaster**

**Chapter 3**

**SsZ-13**

**~Roll `em!**

–

She sat upstairs in her small cabin, to which she did not share. - No matter how much Kenny said _It would save us a heap of money if we shared... _Pish, stuff that little pervert! And after what he did tonight, she just wanted to wring his neck until his face grew purple! Or shred him in half with a sword! Maybe she was going a little overboard... But she just couldn't believe that her childhood friend, the one she trusted the most, would ever go that far. Why didn't he just say something? Instead of taking her on this miserable trip _just_ so **he **could find **his **_perfect _match!

Though, she tried to stay on the thoughts of killing him, but something was in the way... She couldn't quite think of what it was, but every time she tried to pinpoint that big cloud of thought, her heart would beat uncontrollably.

_Snap!  
_

She got it.

It was that dark-haired boy. The one with the chestnut eyes... _Alex? _No. _Adrian? _No.

_Ash? _That was it. _Ash Ketchup. _Or, um, something like that.

This was silly... One look at the boy, and she felt like she was falling head-over-heels? No. That's not right. This was Dawn Berlitz! She wasn't the type to just fall _amazingly _in love with a guy she hadn't even spoken to. _Love at first sight? _It was all just a jumble of words that girls would use instead of saying _I saw him, he was cute, he's the one. _No, Dawn Berlitz was not that type. No exceptions! ...But, she's allowed to change her mind... right? Why not get to know him? How... she hadn't quite figured it out... But she concluded it was better to roam in search for _the boy with the chestnut eyes, _instead of stomping around like a rhino on heat thinking of ways to stomp on that tiny little bug – or otherwise know as – Kenny.

_Because Dawn Berlitz, just wasn't that type of girl._

So the search began for _the boy with the chestnut eyes..._

This shouldn't be too hard, right? It was a normal sized ship, with only a few dozens of thousand people. And looking for that boy would be like looking for a dead blade of grass in a 22 acre field... Nah, shouldn't be too hard at all.

She decided to start out on the deck, where most people spent there time. There were hundreds of people surrounding her! Most of them where laughing, and playing with their friends. While others would lie down on the mats that had been placed around near the railing of the ship; where the cool, crisp air from the fierce ocean would gently make a breeze off the deck. Bringing a warn smile to everybody's faces. Well, almost everyone. There's always one to spoil the party... And that someone happened to be someone she knew quite well...

"Hey Dawn" Kenny chirped, as if nothing happened happened the previous night. But Dawn took no notice of him – she had better things to do.

"Aww, c'mon, Dawn. You're not _still _upset about what happened, are you?" Still no response.

Kenny screwed up his face, getting frustrated at Dawn's reaction. He lunged over at her before she could take another step away from him.

"Let me go, Kenny!" She tried to pull away, but Kenny wasn't about to let that happen.

Dawn kept up her brave face, but inside she was screaming. Not of anger, but of fear. In all her short life, she had never seen Kenny loose his cool like he had now. He wasn't the one for conflict. If it looked like there was a fight about to break, he would normally keep quite and walk away from the situation without a word. He was a bit of a coward like that, but now it looked like he could really blow his top.

"What do you want me to say, huh? I'm sorry, OK? I'm fuckin' sorry!"

"Let go of me, Kenny." It seemed Dawn's "mask" was finally going to break. She could feel tears swell up in her eyes as Kenny man-handled her.

"What? That's it? All I-"

"I think you should quite that..." Came a calm voice from behind.

Kenny felt a hand forcefully grab his shoulder, and his head spun around at reflex.

"Get lost, this is none of your business!" Kenny barked at him, surprising Dawn even more... If she had of been paying much attention. The _he _ was! Yes, _him! _That chestnut-eyed boy. Out of all the people on deck, it had to be _him _who would come to her rescue.

"Well I'll make it my business, if you don't step back you little creep." His soft eyes turned into daggers as he glared at Kenny. He went to open his mouth but kept it shut, letting go of Dawn's arm. He mumbled something under his breath before storming of in another direction. Probably to his cabin to sulk.

"Are you alright?" Dawn was still struck with shock, struggling to find the words to think him. But as she opened her mouth to mumble some gibberish someone on deck began to clap, sheering on the "knight's" heroic action. Before they knew it, almost everybody on deck was cheering him on. It was overwhelming, but he tried to keep on a straight face, still looking at Dawn for an answer.

Looking back from the, before unnoticed, crowd and to the boy standing in front of her she felt something catch in her throat. It was like a thick, wet ball sticking to the back of her throat – as attractive as that sounds.

"U-uh, um... Yeah. Thank-you..."

"No problem." He smiled.

"Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" The crowd chanted.

_Well, this was awkward..._

She was most certainly _not _going to kiss him, no matter how loud they cheered! Because Dawn Berlitz just wasn't that type of girl!

_...right?_


End file.
